Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Chemo Buddies and a decision.

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3 promises    how does one get excited about a new option when it is called a cytotoxic? Abraxane is it's name. I'm having a difficult time wrapping my head around the idea that when the first choice of treatment fails there is hope in the second choice. And then hope in a third choice.

Knowing so many people are praying for me helps. Knowing that you are praying for specific things helps even more. Wednesday is chemo day. I hate chemo and I'm sure it hates me. Knowing that you pray for chemo to pass through God's hands before it enters my body is of great comfort to me.
I feel numb today. I feel lost. I feel like throwing a tantrum, screaming of the great injustice. I won't. I will sit here quietly and think about 3 promises.
#1)   I,Joe, take you Kris, to be my wedded wife. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.
#2)  Romans 8:37-39
No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
 #3) I will fight.
I will sit here and think of those three promises. I am not lost. I am found. I am comforted.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Chemo Buddies.

Today they told her the Chemo is not working.